Welcome back this is episode 44, today I have another guest interview for you. I have guest Monica Denais.
Monica Denais is a Latinx Licensed Professional Counselor, Certified Rehabilitation Counselor, and Mental Health Coach in Dallas, Texas. Monica helps ambitious women and entrepreneurs overcome anxiety, perfectionism, and burnout so they can feel confident in both life and business. Monica has been featured in Women’ss Health Magazine, Verywell Mind, and Insider Magazine. Monica is also the host of the Café with Monica podcast, where she brings amazing entrepreneurs to cover all things life, mental health, and entrepreneurship.
EPISODE LINKS
Thank you for listening, please Subscribe and leave a Review on Apple Podcasts, and Follow me via IG @ManifestYourCareer
Visit my site for more information: https://manifestyourcareer.com/
Get Tips to Manifest 10x Faster Subscribe to my Newsletter Today!
Welcome back this is episode 44, today I have another guest interview for you. I have guest Monica Denais.
Monica Denais is a Latinx Licensed Professional Counselor, Certified Rehabilitation Counselor, and Mental Health Coach in Dallas, Texas. Monica helps ambitious women and entrepreneurs overcome anxiety, perfectionism, and burnout so they can feel confident in both life and business. Monica has been featured in Women’ss Health Magazine, Verywell Mind, and Insider Magazine. Monica is also the host of the Café with Monica podcast, where she brings amazing entrepreneurs to cover all things life, mental health, and entrepreneurship.
EPISODE LINKS
Thank you for listening, please Subscribe and leave a Review on Apple Podcasts, and Follow me via IG @ManifestYourCareer
Visit my site for more information: https://manifestyourcareer.com/
Get Tips to Manifest 10x Faster Subscribe to my Newsletter Today!
Are you feeling stuck, lost or confused about what to do next in your career? Then the manifest your career podcast is just right for you. I'm your host Dr. Norma Reyes, a career mindset coach. I help successful Latinas who are battling self doubt, self sabotage and imposter syndrome. I teach my clients how to combine their intuition, skills and knowledge so that they can manifest their dream career. It's time you start listening to your inner wisdom and guidance. tune in each week to the manifest your career podcast, and learn how to align your mindset to your career goals. Keep listening and together will manifest your dream career. episode 44. Today I have another guest interview for you have a Monica's and nice she's a LAN next LPC certified in rehabilitation counseling, and a mental health coach located in Dallas. Monica helps ambitious women and entrepreneurs overcome anxiety, perfectionism and burnout so that they can feel confident both in life and business. Monica was featured in women's health magazine very well mine and insider magazine. Monica is also the host of cafe with Monica, where she brings in amazing entrepreneurs to cover all things life, mental health and entrepreneurship. So guys, I can't wait for you guys to hear her career journey. Thank you for joining us, Monica. The first question I have for you is can you tell us about your family background? Where did you grow up? And who did you live with? Yeah, so I am from Laredo, Texas. So right on the border of Mexico, I lived most of my life with my grandparents, my cousins, my mom actually got pregnant at a very young age. I think she was 1617 at the time. And so we just kind of like the stereotypical Mexican family. Like we all live together, I grew up with so many cousins, all of my dads were basically pregnant around the same time in the 90s. So it was really nice, because all of my cousins were on the same age. And it wasn't until like later on when I was in probably fifth sixth grade, we moved to our own apartment, like away from my grandparents, but we were still really close. Like I had a really great bond with my grandmother. She was typically the one who was taking care of the kids. And my mom was working. So I've always always been a hard worker. And yeah, my grandparents were just my like my people, I spend most of my time with them. I actually learned how to speak Spanish because of my grandma, my grandma would make me translate all of the letters that would come. And she would also make me read the Bible. And I'm almost super grateful because I was learning English and Spanish at the same time, which I never knew how much that was going to be an asset for me in my career as I was like, trying to get into like the workforce. Yeah, definitely. Right. Those blessings. We don't even know our blessings at the time. Yeah, that sounds like a beautiful upbringing. And you're from Texas. I'm near San Antonio. Oh, nice. Born and raised San Antonio in just moved right outside of San Antonio is still considered Dantonio. But not. Yeah, I love San Antonio. I feel like that was like my first city that I traveled to. And I loved it when my grandparents would take me out who would be they would be like, Oh, Mina, less makitas Or like, like, I was just always amazed that like travel and like, it wasn't until later on we're actually got to see things and go to other cities. So but I love San Antonio. It's amazing. Everyone should move here is when I my husband jokes and laughs because he's like, Oh, she's there she goes trying to convince you to move to San Antonio, because it's awesome. So the next question I have for you is when you were young and people asked you what you wanted to be when you grew up, what do you recall telling them? I think when I was initially young, I wanted to be a lawyer and a criminal investigator. I think it was because I was Washington, Criminal Minds. And also I think at the time, like the Legally Blonde came out and I was like, Oh my gosh, you want to be a lawyer. I'm good at arguing You know, everybody in my family would say you're good at arguing, and that's how it started. It wasn't until later on where I was like, Okay, I'm gonna be a child psychologist, too quickly, then realize that I do not like working with kids. I love kids, but I do not like working with them. And so that definitely changed. But I was still interested in psychology. But yeah, so lawyer, criminal investigator, and then child psychologist, were the three things in my childhood, I could remember I wanted to be, yeah, well, those are all very investigative and curiosity there. So, you know, maybe that was the connection there. So who do you recall being some of your earliest career models that you imagine yourself being like? Yeah, I think for me, a lot of it was like, based in the media, like, you know, people playing lawyers, like I said, or people playing criminal investigators. My family, I mean, like, my grandmother didn't work. My mom was working at at the time, like, as a receptionist, for a certain Laredo, it's a lot import export. So a lot of like trucking companies and things and my mom's home finish high school. So she basically worked her way up in that field. And at the time, like, that was all we knew you could do in Laredo, like being in the truck service or whatever. Or like a teacher, like those were the things that I knew, like I was experiencing, or like, I knew someone would, you know, had that job. But it was mostly me seeing things in the media that really opened up my mindset on like, what I could do. So I can't really tell you like a specific person, like a really like a public figure that I that I admired. But I really just admired people in the media showcasing this, like my favorite show was criminal mind. I just loved each and every character just like how, Oh, and also loved Law and Order SVU I love that show. And I just loved her remember the actresses name, but I just loved her. Like she was just so empowering. And it was like the first time I saw someone, a woman in the media being portrayed as just like the leader, and like the person who is like saving the, the like the like the child or, and I just really loved that. Like, I wanted to help other people. Like, I wouldn't be that helpful. I wouldn't create that impact and change. So yeah, I think for me, it was like actors and actresses is just weird, right? Like we think about who we admired growing up. And for me, it was an actress that wasn't even actually a lawyer wasn't even actually like a, like actual investigator. Yeah, yeah. But the role that she played and what she was showing, right. So now, tell us about your educational background. Did you attend college right after high school, or did you do that later? Yeah. So I actually attended a Early College High School in Laredo. So when I graduated from my high school, I actually graduated with two years worth of college. So I was already considered a junior when I graduated from high school. So I did go to the university. I did two years in the university, and I did a bachelor's in psychology with a minor in sociology. And then I went to pursue my Master's of Science in Rehabilitation Counseling at u and T. And yeah, that's, and then I just did training to get my license for licensed professional counselor. So that's, that was kind of my career path. Early college, high school, university masters. Very straightforward. Yeah. And did you have any struggles or challenges during any of your school? Oh, absolutely. I mean, you asked me about my family background. And one of the things with my family background is because my mom was so young, like we would always bump heads. And there was always a lot of things happening behind the scene. As far as like, you know, people struggling with depression, like my grandmother struggled with depression a lot like she had lost her mother's from cancer, there was a lot of addiction in my family. So all of that like going into the field of psychology and therapy, you are challenged to really be introspective and to kind of see your own family life and to see your own struggles and kind of unpack your traumas and things like that. And so for me, like a lot of the challenges which was growing up, I was always an overachiever, and constantly wanted this need to be perfect. And I quickly realized that seeking perfection, especially as a student would was only going to lead me to burnout and lead me to overextend myself, which did happen in 2015. When I was in my master's program, I didn't realize how much commitments I had said yes to until it was too late until I found myself I'm calling 911, because I thought I was having a heart attack, which that was actually my first experience with a panic attack, and real and then going diagnosed with generalized anxiety disorder. And I was like, Oh my gosh, like, I never knew that this was something that I had heard that I was managing. And for some people, they would say, was like high functioning anxiety, because I was able to mask, I was able to do everything on paper. And if you see, you're like an outsider looking in, you're like, oh my gosh, she's hitting her goals. Like, it's much more like she's doing all the right things. But, but I, but there was some, but even like, being an overachiever, there was a very unhealthy way of navigating that and navigating my achievements. So yeah, those were some of the challenges learning how to rest, learning how to not base my worth on my achievements were some of the challenges that I experienced through my education. And even then also, another challenge was, because I was so sheltered I came from Laredo, Texas, predominantly Hispanic, that when I moved to do my master's, a, u and T, which was way more diverse than my hometown, I had to learn a lot more about diversity and inclusion, a lot more about the microaggressions happening around me, because I hadn't realized that, like, I had never experienced that. Because when you're basically with your people, right with people that you work with that share that same ethnicity as you, like, you don't get to deal with the microaggressions. I remember my first microaggression was when I was like working as a server. And there's this white family. And they're like, Oh, my God, you speak really good English. Like you, you You speak English very well. And I was like, Well, yeah, I mean, I'm American like, and that was like, my first time that I Oh, my God, this is a microaggression. And I didn't even realize it. And it wasn't until I went to UT. And like it was learning and had. Now I was able to develop more friendships with other people of different ethnicities, different race. And I was like, Oh, my God, that was also a challenge, because then I had to relearn just what I learned growing up, you know, learning about, I didn't know that there were some things that were considered racist, because I grew up all with all Hispanic people, Latinos, and then realizing man, like, even though I was part of minority, like, there was also racism in part of my minority, but you know, against black people. And so like, all of those were challenges that I had to own up to. And I had to, like, just understand my biases, because again, like in therapy in a therapeutic, master's program, you're going to get have to learn all those, you have to learn how to be a culturally competent therapist, and be able to be open and understand all walks of life. So yeah, there was definitely some challenges. Yeah, thank you for being so vulnerable with everything that you just saw. And you made me think about so many different things. I myself am a licensed therapist as well. And you sad, something that stood out to me, you said about the microaggression. So growing up in San Antonio, of course, Latinos are the majority, right. And so I always would say that to some of my peers in my Ph. D. program, like hey, you know, I didn't face a lot of that racism that maybe you did, and they actually I found like, then they were, you know, kind of telling me like, No, you just, were you're wrong, right? Like, are you tell me I'm wrong about my own experience. I'm telling you, I don't get mistreated. I don't have those things happening on a daily basis. Now, I did not say that I didn't ever but I was a lot darker growing up because you know, I was out on the Sun more. I was very, very Modena. So I did have it. But I think a lot of times like you kind of mentioned it was more within my own people that I faced that colorism and but one of the first times that it really stuck out to me that was a microaggression, from a white person was just like in high school. And we were like in a different area of town because mostly, the Mexicans are mostly in the central to the South side of town, maybe Northwest a little bit, right, not really on the northeast side. And then in San Antonio is a little more mixed now. But at the time, it definitely was older white people and so into this mall that used to be out there and I remember asking a lady where's the dressing room like so I was gonna try on some jeans. And she's like, Oh, it's right there. Right and so I'm like, about to go through the aisles and she's like, Oh, no, you can go through the like the walkway, right? So I wouldn't go through the aisles. At the time. I didn't understand like, why she was telling me I need to walk all the way around. Like, how does that make sense? I can just cut like through through here, right? And it took a while to process that I just knew that I was like, I knew there was something wrong. I didn't have the words for it at the time, because I think I was like, I don't know, 17 or 18. I just knew that it made me feel ugly. So when you mentioned about the I'm telling you, you know, you speak English? Well, I wish sometimes I could go back and kind of like, snap back at these people and be like, Why is the floor hot there? Or something? Right? Or? Or like, oh, yeah, you speak English? Well, too good job for us. Right? You know, like to just make them feel silly about what they just said, because a lot of times people aren't telling you something to be mean, they may not even realize what they've said to you. You know, we can't just assume that these people are because there's things that we say and do that we may not even realize we're doing. Oh, yeah, no, yeah. And like the program that I went in rehabilitation counseling, so it's really a specialty in counseling focused on disability advocacy, and helping people with disabilities find employment. And I had to really learn how me as a Hispanic saw people with disabilities, because growing up, we will be highest on Melito. Don't stare because you know, and like, you know, that or, or, or like, using words like retarded and those kinds of things. And I'm like, Ah, like, oh my god, like, that's how much that's how they taught me. And so really had to learn all that read, learn how to be able to advocate for people with disabilities, because for in, in my family culture, we were just like, Don't stare at someone Leto like something's wrong with them, you know, very seen as very different marginalized, like, so yeah, I think our experiences really do shape, like how we perceive things. And then until we're in a place where we can educate ourselves, and really unlearn some of the things that we've learned growing up. Yeah. And I feel like sometimes when we have those experiences with, you know, white folks, it's like, they may have never come across someone to educate them about our, you know, like that we're both American and that we're, that we both can speak English. Like, it's just, it's, it was it was crazy for me, when I when I was sitting there, I was like, I'm okay, like, I didn't even know how to react. I was like, I don't now I know, right? Now I can stand up for myself and advocate for myself, and let that be a teaching moment for them. But before I was like, Oh, my gosh, I don't know. And also, like this halo effect, do you know about the halo effect, right, like when we perceive someone as attractive or, or in higher ranking or have authority, we now trust them more. And that's what I realized that I had for white people like this, this halo effect like that. They were good people, you know, and so unlearning that unlearning that not all white people are good people or do good things. You know, so it's just yeah, a lot of relearning and unlearning. Yeah, I'd hadn't heard of it before. And I don't think I've ever I don't I think I probably don't trust people. So which can be from your experience, right like that? Yeah, it's the tendency for positive interactions, or positive friendship of a specific person. So it's like, we know, like, we think of someone who's blond, blue eyes, like we immediately trust them or any person who's attractive like that. You're like, if you go to the doctor's office, and your doctor is really attracted, like you're more likely to trust them. Yeah, just keep thinking now. No, I don't give anybody my trust. Like you gotta earn it. And if you are blue eyed and blonde, I'm sorry, guys. If you are, this is not this is not directed to you directly. But I had an experience with my freshman year, I had a blond haired blue eyed roommate and I was super excited because I'm like, the exact opposite. I don't look as brown as I did back then when I was very brown, because I would spend all my time outside. And so I remember being super excited. And then she did not want to be my friend. I don't know, like, the reason why we never really got to connect. And so you know, from then on, like, I'm like, Well, screw you then. Like, you don't want to be my friend. Fine. Anyway, that's a whole other tangent, but yeah, yeah, yeah. rejection and friendship is so real. And it can definitely those little moments can define how we, you know, trust people how we like put ourselves out there. So I get it. You know, trust is a hard thing. And I'm glad that you put you know, a standard to have people earn your trust. Like I think that's a good thing. Yeah, yeah, definitely. It's it's a balance, guys, because you do have to be willing to trust people. For sure. So now share with us how you career has unfolded since completing your degrees and to where you are now. Yeah, I honestly never thought that I would be a mental health therapist with my own private practice. Well, during school, I was working as a graduate assistant for a minority program to help Hispanic black students get into the field because we really needed more Latinos, more people of color in the field. And so I was helping not doing that. And then I got a job as a job coach, job placement person. So basically, I would help people with disabilities, varieties where they have anxiety, whether it was a physical impediment, or if they had a developmental issue, I would help them job coach. So if they would, let's just say we had a kid who worked and wanted to work at Kroger's, we would help them learn how to do the job in their own way, really focusing on their strengths, versus focusing on their limitation. So I did that I loved working with that population, I just loved giving people access to take care of their own money like and to be able to, because having your own money gives you access to other resources. And I just love that idea. And I never knew that there was that type of counseling, and that type of specialists that you could be that so I did that. But ultimately, I wanted to work for Texas Workforce Commission as a vocational rehab counselor. And I remember just really wanting this I kept applying to places did interviews. And I kept getting rejection after rejection after rejection. Finally, I was able to get the job, only to realize that I used to not love that job. I hated, I hated I love the people that I worked with. But truly your team is going to make a big impact, like the people that you work with, not the people that you serve the people that I serve that loved the people that I worked with. And just the because it was a government job, go working for that agency, there was a lot of bureaucracy, and there was a lot of just like, you were just a small person compared to the whole system. And so it triggered back my need to achieve my knee two people, please. I saw myself people pleasing with my boss, and just constantly driving myself basically to burnout. So I was there for about two and a half years until finally I said, You know what I really want to move on. So I started applying to other places. And at the time, I had started my podcast cafe with Monica, to really just talk about mental health issues I was really passionate about. And I really wanted to put my passion and focus into something. And while also getting my internship hours, I was now already trying to get licensed as a therapist, but never to work for someone else. I just wanted the license. And doing this podcast, I just wanted for people to get to know me and things like that. So I was still in this agency job doing the podcast getting my licensing hours. And finally, you know, I applied to UTA, which is University of Texas in Arlington for a disability specialist job. Because I was not ready to go on my own just yet. I was like, No, I still want the stability of a nine to five. And so that experience completely changed the way I see leadership. I had such an amazing leader I can not looking back like my boss was just so great. I'm glad that I came from that burnout experience to her and working for her team. Because she valued self care valued rest always was checking in to make sure we were doing great, I had amazing coworkers really developed good friendships there. And it also gave me the mental space to start working on outside things. Which finally was I wanted to be an entrepreneur I wanted to build my business I wanted to do things on my own terms. But now I'm coming out of it at a place of not survival but more so passion and you know and purpose. And it wasn't like I'm just trying to get to the next step because I'm just so burned out from here. No, I remember. It was October it was September of 2020. And at the time I was already doing my private practice part time so timeline agency job moved to the University job got license opened up my practice part time again still thinking I'm just doing this for money on the side like I love this thing but I'm I still love my nine to five I still love my stability to then September 2020 where I'm like, I really need do this full time I'm ready. Like, I feel so ready. So outside of my, like, no longer burned out, I feel good. And so I, we were also quarantined, I think or worse also working from home and I teams to my boss, and I was like, I have to tell you this, but I'm ready to move on and take my business full time. And she was super aware already about my business. And she was, um, she was like, you know, we hate to like for you to go, but you know, we're gonna cheer you on. And we're excited for you. And that's where now I'm full time as my own business owner, private practice owner. And I work with ambitious women and women entrepreneurs to help them deal with just like the everyday struggles and mental health concerns. And I love what I do. But that was basically my journey. Like, it was crazy, right out of school thinking, this is what I want. I want a nine to find agency job. Like I felt my path was so clear. And then being very discouraged that when I was there, it just wasn't what I imagined it would be. Yeah, yeah, that happens really often. Like we think we know what we want. And there's nothing wrong with, you know, ending up in the wrong place, quote, unquote, because nothing's ever wrong. It's a learning experience. Right? Because you know, you, you still had, like you mentioned, you know, you got all of that retriggered. So you still needed to work on those, a lot of times we find ourselves in the same place, no matter what job we get. Because it is, you know, retriggering, something we still need to work on. I absolutely always will tell a client not to run away from a job because so many people do that we expect that, you know, the next job is going to be different. But guess what, we are still the same person. So it's not going to be any different. Yeah, unless you get a good boss, that kind of helps you along the way. Yeah. And I will say this, though. Yes, I do believe you because yes, I was retriggered. And that's why in 2019, before I went into my job at the university, I started therapy up again. And I was able to just have so many amazing breakthroughs of childhood experiences that I hadn't really unpacked to where I felt so good about applying for that job, taking the interview, and then when my boss because she's a good boss, also enforcing my boundaries, which I had no boundaries. In my previous job, it was my first job, like first real nine to five job out of school every before then I was just working either part time or as a contractor, never nine to five. I was also really young, everybody else was a little bit older than me in that agency. So I felt like I had to prove myself. So again, that retriggered right, like this idea that my worth is like only on the things that I do and then that imposter syndrome. So yeah, going back to therapy in 2019. And not year, that's when I make the move. But I was actively working on myself and actively identifying, okay, if I'm going to move to this next job, because I agree with you, leaving a job just running away from a job expecting a different result is such a bad move. It's only a matter of time before you're back with the same tendencies, because ultimately you have control over your actions and reactions. So yeah, definitely, I had more boundaries, I would say no, now I was okay with just doing my job. And even my 100% or even 75% was way better than other people. So I was like, I believed in myself, I believe in my work ethic, and just allow myself to slow down. There's nothing, I didn't have to prove myself, like, I was a good worker, and really understanding my value. And what I bring to the table really helped now as well as a good team dynamic. So yes, totally agree. Yeah. And that's high achievers, right. What we believe to be like 100% might actually be like 400%. So you got to take that into perspective to something you sad? Oh, man, I should have wrote it down. I'll try to remember what I was gonna ask you. But ask you the next question. Well, I tried to remember what I was going to ask. But what has been the most influential experience in your career so far? I'm going to I want to share this story about when I was in that agency, and I was sure I was going to today or B. And I was now starting to enforce my boundaries before I was leaving. So this is my manager because my manager, I had just the hardest time to say no. And it was so influential because I remember her coming into my office and saying like, Hey, we're adding these extra things on your plate. Granted, I was the youngest with the lease experience. There was all these other senior counselors, but basically they couldn't give them more work because that's just how things were right like they basically worked here. They earned their time. Mm hmm. There you go. They earn their time. So of course, everything's gonna fall on me. So then she's telling me like, I'm gonna put more of these things. And I'm like, Well, if you're gonna add those things, I need you to remove XY and Z, because I can't add any of that. And she was like, No, I know, you can do it. I know, you can do it. And I was like, I appreciate you believing in me and feeling like I can. But I know personally, I cannot. And I remember her walking away. And I'm sitting there in my office. And I'm like, cuz she just walked away. She's like, and she just walked through. I wish people could see my face. But she's, and in my Oh, my God, this is what putting boundaries in place is right? Because I put boundaries in place, but never with like, just high conflict. And so she walks away. I sit in my office, and I'm just like, oh, my gosh, I immediately want to go and take everything I just said back, it felt so uncomfortable. But I didn't. And that was where I'm like, that's such a good moment. For me, that's, like, that was a very influential moment for me, because there are going to be people in your life are going to push you, or, you know, want you to push through something. But you ultimately know how far you can go. And that was super influential for me. Yeah, I love that. I love that and actually remembered what I was going to say and ask, and this totally relates to. So you know, as a first gen professional, you don't have anybody to ask these questions to, you don't have anybody to tell you like, Nah, girl, don't, don't be putting up with that, like, you know, talk to them. You know, here's the professional way to say this, here's the professional way to send, you know, set these boundaries. And as first gen professionals, like we don't have anyone, right. And I know if I go to my parents, and tell them like I'm struggling at work, and they're telling me to do this. My mom and dad are just gonna be like, beside glue, like, what else are you gonna do do the job? Not notary hospital, he has kids skate, you know, whatever. And my mom too, like, I like now that I'm an adult. And I'm telling my mom about my experiences. My mom was such always a good advocate for me. And she was always like, no, like, you know what you have to do, like, it's not okay. But even then she would share also, cuz she was working a nine to five had bosses. And she was like, I struggled with that too like that, because she didn't have anybody to tell her what to do, how to do things. I mean, she worked her way up. And while some people are coming in with education, exactly where she's at, and she's only got experience, she doesn't have the educational background, but so it's cool to see like the difference and how she also struggled with it, too. So I was glad I was able to share that with her. And I would just cry. And she was good. And that was part of my healing journey, too. Like when I was in therapy, healing that relationship with my mom. And now we're able to have those kinds of conversations. But I know that a lot of Latinos don't have that type of, you know, conversations or, you know, talking about heavy topics, like Black Lives Matters and all these different things. Like, it's hard to talk about those things with family, when they come at you with not so great empathy. Yeah. And and, you know, they're really just trying to encourage us, right, like, they're not trying to dismiss our feelings or thoughts or any of that. They just really wanted, you know, they're trying to pick us up in the way that they know how. Yeah, so now, what has been some of the worst career advice that you believe you received so far? Um, just keep working really hard. And eventually, like, good things will happen. There's at the end, that's something I had to unlearn. If you work really hard, good things will happen. Sometimes you can work really hard and terrible days. So it's never guaranteed. So work at the pace that feels right for you. If you advocate for yourself, like those are the things that not just working hard. Yeah, yeah. I always to the working hard. I always think my parents work hard. They work hard, and they not get any career opportunities from working hard. It's the network. It's building connections. And, and granted, that's work. You know, that can be hard work, but I always had trouble with the 8020 rule. Like that. 80 20% of the effort leads to 80% of the results. I was like, was like No 100% of the effort, you know? So yeah, like having to unlearn that. That was the worst advice I got. Alright, so now let's hear what has been the best career advice that you've received. The best career advice was, this is just a job and you have a whole life outside of this, and that was something that the nine to five that I had just left in October of 2020. That was my boss. She was like, this is just a job. Like you get to live your life outside of this, like that's, this is just a vessel for you to be able to live your lifestyle. And this is only one part of your identity. This is not everything. And that's the greatest advice I got. Because yes, like, I don't work. What is it? I don't live to work. I work yeah, I don't live to work. I live live to work where I don't know, whatever. The thing is, but yeah, like I, I, I want to be able to have the lifestyle that I love. And I'm glad that my work. And what I do is a vessel that it's only one part of my identity versus all my identity. Yeah, yeah, it's so important. And what a blessing to have someone tell you that right? This is just the job. Because sometimes that's what we have to remind ourselves like, this is the job that's paying the bills for the life that I want. And ultimately, I have the option to change it. But maybe you don't want to maybe you just need to accept that. Okay, I'm okay, where I'm at. And I have to accept that. Oh, now what career advice do you have to share with my audience? You're not always going to love what you do every single day. And that's okay. Like there's going to be fluctuations in your emotions and feelings about what you're doing right now. And that is okay. And just because you love it doesn't mean you will not have hard days. It just leaning into that. That is okay to have hard days. Because I think sometimes like, as an entrepreneur, they're like, well, you're doing what you love, should you just be happy? And it's like, sometimes days are hard. And it's okay to have those hard days. Sometimes things are challenging. And yes, I love what I do. But if I'm having a hard day, I'm gonna feel my feelings. So feel your feelings. And understand that even though it's a job that you love, it's okay to not like it's yes, yes. I love that feel the feels so much of everything that we're taught goes against filling the fields, but we need to we need to be able to heal. Absolutely. And so now tell us how we can reach you. And then also what you have going on in Monaco. Yeah, absolutely. So you can find me on Instagram at Cafe with Monica. You can also check out my podcast if you are an ambitious woman, woman entrepreneur. And you just kind of want to learn from other people's stories and journeys and Gotha with Monica on any podcast platform. And what I have going on right now is honestly I'm in a season of just rest and intention. And I have offers like I do therapy here in Texas if you're in Texas, I do mental health coaching if if you need that kind of guidance in your business as an ambitious woman, more mindset work. So yeah, but right now I'm just kind of living my life intentionally not really worried about like, all all the things. I'm just being very present right now. So that's what's going on. Thank you so much. And I'll be sure to include all the links and everything in the show notes. Thank you again for being here with us and sharing your career journey being vulnerable on Yeah, I just loved everything. Thank you. Thank you so much, Norma. Thank you for listening to them manifest your career podcast with me, your host Dr. Norma Reyes, a career and mindset coach. Learn more today on manifest your career.com